i've been struggling since friday..
thinking of the plan: being a fren is much more better than being a couple..
finally i let go..
maybe because i want him to care for me for life...?
sumtimes i can be rational and let go easily..
its like i agree and understand y both of us need to do so..
but sumtimes i reli get very emo and lose control..
especially during the nights..
felt very insecure without his accompaniment..
so i will keep calling and disturb him..
i reli dun wan it..but i reli cant take it...
wonder y he can bail so easily continue his life like there's ntg happen before...
n im the one to clean up the mess..?
my emo probs, mum's nagging and she disallow me to pak tor anymore..
treat me sumthg like i was in secondary school and lock me at home..
finally he gets mad and scold me..for disturbing him..
say frens wont kacau each other,
but does he noe y im doin so?
i noe myslf clear..i reli cant let go..
even for life i oso will keep disturb..
dats y i rather walk away from him for life..not even a fren anymore..
yes i will cont crying anytime i feel like doing so,,
but i will try my best to hide from him...
its juz a week ago v had our vacation..
its unbelievable dat things happen dat fast..
i'll try to cope...
feeling numb nw..cant even cry jor~
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